Trusting God’s will

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side note: Best quiet time combination includes: COFFEE, CROSSROADS, and JESUS.

As God’s little girl is overwhelmed by the headache of projects, 10+ page papers, and various expectations of an ASU college student, she questions what her future will hold. Why not stay awake to write a blog about God’s character and avoid work? little girl thinks it is acceptable. If college is such an exhausting burden, where is the light at the end of the tunnel? Sometimes, she wishes that God would provide a roadmap of her life. She constantly ponders the “what ifs” and prays for crystal clear clarity in her life with….

What am I going to do with a special education major?

Am I the best fit for this major?

Could my learning disability just go away?

What relationship do I yearn for?

Should I go on a mission this summer?

Where in the world is the LORD leading me?

But hey, God never works in little girl’s timing or control. Everything she currently wants is not matching up with what the Lord wants. In response, little girl has completely dropped her control of this world and is faithfully leaning on His Truth.

Little girl has been replaying this song this week.

“The pathway is broken and the signs are unclear

And I don’t know the reason why You brought me here

But just because You love me the way that You do

I’m gonna walk through the valley if You want me to

‘Cause I’m not who I was when I took my first step

And I’m clinging to the promise You’re not through with me yet

So if all of these trials bring me closer to You

Then I will go through the fire if You want me to

It may not be the way I would have chosen

When You lead me through a world that’s not my home

But You never said it would be easy

You only said I’d never go alone

So when the whole world turns against me and I’m all by myself

And I can’t hear You answer my cries for help

I’ll remember the suffering Your love put You through

And I will go through the darkness if You want me to”

(Ginny Owens, “If You Want Me To”)

As freshman year is full of new friends, new relationships, new environments, and a new chapter of your life, sophomore year brings “big girl” life decisions. When little girl anxiously examines every situation, she loses sight of the Lord’s beauty. She blindly thought this life was under her will, not the Lord’s will. She discovered the Lord’s simple two-word answer, TRUST ME. The Lord never said this life would be easy. If life were consistently a jar full of flowers, there wouldn’t be a need for an authentic faith with the LORD. Yet, what would faith be?

Today, little girl read  the Word and discovered more of the Lord’s trust:

Isaiah 17:5-8:“Cursed is the one who trusts in man, who draws strength from mere flesh and whose heart turns away from the Lord. That person will be like a bush in the wastelands; they will not see prosperity when it comes. They will dwell in the parched places of the desert, in a salt land where no one lives. But blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord, whose confidence is in him. They will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit.”

Like this bible verse says, little girl strives for the tree that bears fruit and is always green. The Lord wants us to daily yearn for the deepest joy in the Lord where the “heat” of this world never knocks her tree down.

Little girl prays:

“Dear Lord,

Under your perfect timing, I trust YOUR will for my life. If it is not part of YOUR will, LORD shut every door in allowing it to happen. You know me better than I know myself so drive all these minuscule anxieties out of my life. “I can do all thing through Christ who strengthens me” Philippians 4:13

Goodnight all..

Have faith in the will of the LORD

Oh, Boone Weather

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Running is the best way to clear little girl’s mind from the world’s distractions.

Isaiah 55:8-9: “For my thoughts, neither are you ways my ways, declares the Lord. As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts.”

While exalting the mountain’s beauty, little girl slowly realizes Boone winter is fastly approaching. In two weeks, “white stuff” will appear falling from the sky. The famous Boone WIND is back in action. Stronger than ever.

Little girl and “suite mate” slowly training for a half-marathon. Today’s task: Run at Moses Cone in short sleeves and t-shirts. Glare after Glare, Question after Question. BIG mistake.

Frozen hands, numb legs, and purple lips (Thank goodness for seat warmers)

Little girl thanks God for sunshine and her ability to get out and run in His creation.

Little girl enjoys the little perks of each day but sadly realizes classes actually happen tomorrow.

Struggles=Faith Testers

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A hard-working, dedicated girl is drowning in hatred of herself. Her mind wrestles with thoughts including:

You are ugly

You are awkward

You don’t have any friends.

You are dumb.

What ifs

You are labeled with Auditory Processing Disorder.

You cannot pronounce foreign words.

All you do is school

How are you going to get a degree?

Satan was fighting and winning in this little girl’s mind. The worldly standards made HERSELF her WORST enemy. These disguising thoughts started causing great anxiety to get the best of her. She said she was a Christian. Was she really living for the LORD? Jesus would never think like that. She was unconsciously fixated in the ugliness of her sin. The girl started finding her identity and confidence in other people and the world. Guess what? People make mistakes and have a human nature. She was NEVER SATISFIED with their answers. God was hurting because this beautiful girl saw NOTHING positive in her. God loves this little girl’s heart and he wanted her to FULLY SURRENDER to him. Her faith needed growth and she would slowly be receptive to Him. So you know what he did? God snatched the love of her life out of sight and reach. God knew this little girl was strong enough to run to HIM instead of away. Her sin nature reacted with

Rain           Sleep deprivation       Loneliness              Darkness     Worry

Confusion   Fixation         Blurred Salvation         Control   Selfishness             Tense

Anxiety               Fear       Escape                Anger       Frustration         Loss of Appetite       Manipulation  Impatience   Tears     Rock Bottom         Fake

The Lord laughingly questioned why this little girl would not rest in Him instead of the world. She was smarter than that. She knows about the Lord’s character. JESUS DIED for her and her ugly sin. SHE IS SET FREE FROM ANXIETY and LOW SELF WORTH. After intense spiritual warfare, she let go of control and fell on the ground. Realization struck her restless heart.

God open his arms and said,

All you need is here inside My arms

Just breathe and you’ll be safe and sound with Me

No one knows you better than Me

No one’s been a better friend

So rockabye baby, come and rest

You’ve been tired lately

Lay your head down

Don’t you think, Baby, I know best?

I’ve been a Father for a long time

(Ceclie Lullaby by Steffany Gretzinger)

And……

I’m no longer a slave to fear

I am a child of God

I’m no longer a slave to fear

I am a child of God

(No Longer Slaves by Jonathan David and Melissa Helser)

Her perspective was open to authentic truth. Everything she knew moved from her head into her HEART! Praise God! God filled her heart with STILLNESS,     REST             STRUGGLE   PATIENT      FAITH               TRUST         CONFIDENCE     COMFORT     COMPLETE SURRENDER    FREEDOM       JOY       HURT       LIGHT       BEAUTIFUL       PURPOSE CONTENTMENT           WORTH   FIRE     CALM       THIRST           LOVELINESS

She is resting in a valley with God’s light shining brighter than ever. She is full of emotions and knowing it is okay not to be okay. She loves the love of her life more than ever. She is hopeful of God’s intricate plan for their Christ-center lives. No matter if they are apart or together, she is praising the time she was treated like a princess.

God intricately reveals this little girl’s journey in HIS perfect timing and he does the same for you if you FULLY SURRENDER your life.

Daily, the little girl throws her negative thoughts away and confidently finds worth in the Lord.